What’s the most badass thing your boss has ever done?

There was a time when I was working a maximum security prison. This was the top of the line for inmates just shy of death row. We held a lot of people sentenced to multiple life sentences, fifty years and more.

A trick inmates like to play was to feign a medical injury then when staff opened their cell, said inmate would jump up and start fighting.

I had one inmate on my block and he was gargantuan, easily six foot five and three hundred pounds. Had he wanted to he could have incapacitated me by just knocking me down and sitting on my chest for three minutes. He looked like Fezzik from Princess Bride.

I knew that he was being interrogated for serial killings linked to him by the FBI. If they could crack him a couple life sentences would be added to his twenty year stretch. He had nothing to lose.

To add insult to injury, life threw him a curveball. His mother died and he was locked up, unable to see her. When I heard this I was convinced he would at the minimum attempt a suicide.

My prediction seemed to come true when I heard another inmate in the neighboring cell calling my name. I walked over and he pointed towards Fezzik whose cell was next to his. I shone my flashlight in and he was lying on the ground motionless.

Following policy I called in an emergency alert to the unit. We were short staffed, so short staffed that two sergeants came by to help. I was starting to think that Fezzik had snapped and the second we rolled his door that we would be in a clobbering match with a man three times my body size. All I had was some pepper spray and a vest.

We rolled his door and there was a massive pause as we all looked around to see who the unlucky bastard to go into the cell first would be. I will admit that bastard was not going to be me.

A small sergeant, a man called Sgt. Click didn’t hesitate, not even beyond one second. He was shorter than me and had no gear but he went head first into the cell, towing what I imagined to be basketball sized steel testicles in his pants. Fortunately for us, Fezzik was not looking for a fight. He had taken his frustration out on the cell wall, slipped and knocked himself out cold on the cell floor.

We got him out and to the hospital wing. I had nothing but the highest respect for Sgt Click after that.